September 30, 2003

The Curse of the Child Care Providers

Before I moved to California, I watched school age children in an after school program.

Today, K brought one of her daughters in after school. She was supposed to do her homework. But, every time I looked over, she was playing on the internet.

So, I kept prodding her:

"Are you done with your homework yet?"

"If you do it now, you can play later without worrying about it."

"Do your homework."

Homework!"

Then, she said she was finished. So, I asked K if I could look it over.

K's daughter handed me a piece of scrap paper. I told her I knew her teacher wouldn't accept that. "Oh, I'm going to rewrite it on lined paper when I get home."

I ran upstairs and grabbed some lined paper that I have. She gave me a dirty look. "You're worse than my mom!" I just laughed and told her that some of the words were misspelled. Didn't tell her which words though.

Then, instead of rewriting the answers (It was 5 questions. 15 minutes of work, tops), she plays on the internet.

So, I keep calling the intercom at the desk she's at. "Hoooomework!" "Do your Hooooomework!" Hooomework!"

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

She finally finished her homework, by the way.

Posted by Ninjababe at 11:02 PM | Comments (1)

September 28, 2003

Damn Disneyland! Damn them!

Disneyland has forever wrecked me for cheap hot chocolate.

Never again can I drink the 'just ad hot water' type of hot chocolate. Ghiradelli and Cadbury's is a suitable second replacement for when I don't have time to make real hot chocolate (Which ingredients are semi-sweet chocolate bits, milk, a dash of salt, and depending on the recipe eggs, brown sugar, cayenne pepper, etc etc etc).

I blame it all on The Vineyard Room at Disney's California Adventure. It's a semi-expensive wine tasting dinner. You pay a flat rate and get a three or four course meal. When I went there in the fall and they had hot chocolate as one of the desserts.

That time around, I didn't get any. I tried someone else's though. It was to die for. We're talking bliss here.

Next time we went to The Vineyard Room, luckily it was still on the menu. I ordered it. Mmmmmmmmmm.

A chocoholic's wet dream come true.

Now, I just need to make some at home with godiva... [drool].

Posted by Ninjababe at 5:26 PM

September 25, 2003

Because I Care

Just for Jay!

Picture from here.

(This Jay btw)

Posted by Ninjababe at 10:04 PM | Comments (5)

September 24, 2003

Mmmmmmmmmm

Man, Godiva Belgian Dark Chocolate ice cream is almost orgasmic.

Rasberry Truffle is pretty damn close too.

Posted by Ninjababe at 10:42 PM | Comments (2)

September 23, 2003

Spam! Spam! Spam! Spammity Spam!

So, the newest spam I'm receiving is from an account called 'admin@ondragonswing.com' stating that unless I follow a link (Or look at the information attached), my account will be terminated.

That always gives me a chuckle. A real big chuckle.

For, you see, I am the admin on this domain.

Bwahahahahahahahaha! Funny

Posted by Ninjababe at 10:28 PM

Here's Looking for You, Kid

To stop Jay from badgering, I'm making a post.

So, Jay, :P

Anyway, I've decided that power steering is of the good. I had to borrow a roommates car to go to a dinner for work (Had steak... mmmmmm... nice and rare). My wrists hurt now. Owwie

Saw Pirates of the Caribbean for the 9th time today. The last two times, I've been watching Jack Sparrow... sorry, Captain Jack Sparrow... exclusively. What a great character!

Johnny Depp is a good actor. He's one of the actors who can convey more with a look than most actors do with a monologue...

See, Jay, I posted.

Now, leave me alone :P

Posted by Ninjababe at 10:26 PM | Comments (3)

September 18, 2003

Once Upon a Time in Mexico

Or, as I like to call it for some bizarre reason: Happily Ever After in LA

Pretty good movie, only four really gross bits (Bull, face, eyes, knees)

Loved Sands (Played by Johnny Depp)'s T-shirts.

Had quite a giggle when Sands said 'Savvy?'

The Spanish translations weren't translated quite right. I don't speak Spanish, but I'm around it enough that the bits that were in Spanish, I knew weren't right. Someone at work who does speak Spanish fluently agrees with me. Even though, it was kinda cool that I could actually figure that out!

OK... Guitars with guns in them would not play! Even though, I did like the flame thrower. That was actually realistic.

Enrique Iglesias was actually pretty good. Saw him in the opening credits, and was like 'huh?'. But, he was pretty good... This was his first acting role as far as I can see in IMDB.

Posted by Ninjababe at 8:42 PM | Comments (4)

September 15, 2003

Utah Tidbits

Zion has the biggest vertical cliff in world.

Jim L is the best shuttle driver in Zion to get... He's got some great stories.

Menu Falls - Wonderful falls between the Big Bend and Temple of Sinawava. It's not mentioned in guide books or maps. It's a very quiet, lovely spot.

I kept up with Ith and Jen drinking. For the first time. At 7000 ft!

The Moab Brewery - Wonderful website!

In Vegas:
We saw:
-A Drug deal
-A prostitution deal
-hookers looking for deal
-outfits that make my skanky-ho pirate top look tame (guys seemed to like it though. Especially with the temp butterfly tattoo on my left breast.)
-Street brawl
-Prostitute / Stripper cards
-I was totally unimpressed with the Belagio
-The Paris has awesome decor. Love the ceiling. It's like a cloudy sky.
-So, it's Sin City - yet no barred windows... Is it because there's no real down time? Casino security?
-Roberta found new drink! She likes gin and tonic.

Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... what else?

Oh yeah!

Roberta gave me a bottle of Scapa as a gift. Mmmmmm... I carried it around for a bit like a baby.

Then, Glenn dropped it.

Onto tile flooring.

Luckily, it was only about a foot.

It didn't break, but I did rush into the bed room and rubbed the bottle with a white sheet to check for cracks.

Then, we discovered that the corked lid had broken off. So, now, I have a nearly full bottle of Scapa sitting on my shelf and I'm currently too lazy to get into it.

Which is good I guess, because that means it'll last longer. :)

Denise made the mistake of giving me the camera one day. Early that morning, she said "Oh, I have 64 pictures on this memory card. And another card as well. Plenty of shots." Then, after I got the camera, I filled it up. And, there were still four days to go! :)

She didn't let me have the camera after that.

There are two new cleavage cam shots for my collection. One in my skanky-ho pirate top, the other in a wet bikini top.

Saw the harvest moon over Bryce. Pretty.

From what I saw, I prefer Zion over Bryce.

The peanut butter and chocolate pie at the Bryce lodge restaurant is awesome.

There's more, but I'm going to stop now.

Posted by Ninjababe at 10:04 PM | Comments (2)

The Utah Quote List

Quotes said by Denise, Roberta, Glenn, April, Jen, Dave, Miscellaneous Waiters, and Johnny Depp (Well, I was told it was him when I returned to the table.)

-----

It's because I'm a member of the Right Wing Conspiracy and my black helicopter follows me wherever I go.

That's the third time she's groped my leg.

Savvy?

Stop torturing the wildlife.

It's hotter than a pile of dead kippers out here.

I've got boobs, OK? I got stuck!

Weee! Again!

That's because I want my Ninja-Piglet to be happy.

Did I miss out on groping?

But, WHY is the camera gone?

"That's why I love her. She's special!"
"She cooks her meat."

Come over here so I can fondle you!

"We're going to have to eat a lot."
"Oh woe is us!"

Let's have a group grope!

"What are you looking for?"
"Pot!"

I've been drinking. I'm not going to be polite anymore.

Give me the damn knife, woman!

Remind me to kill you all in your sleep.

"In case you're wondering, I called you all idiots in Japanese."
"We still love you."

I'll take the left breast, you take the right.

"I'm hiding behind her breasts."
"Me, too."

"Can you put that against the wall, please?"
"Why?"
"I want to look at her breasts."

You could hide two of me behind her breasts!

Does anyone want to suck her salt?

That's how she can support you! Fire breathing in bars.

I'll try anything at least once.

Feel me!

Give the waiter her as a tip.

I'm not the one who got her breasts stuck in the car, OK?

Let no cherry go to waste.

Good coffee. Or, it probably is good coffee, if I could taste it.

"One day... One day, I'll make her snort water through her nose."
"I'll snort it over you."
"It'll be Cleavage Falls!"

Come back tomorrow for breakfast! We need the money!

"I figured out what you are! You're my ward!"
"Like Batman and Robin."

Every time she gets into the car, I hear a screech.

She's trying to drag her bosoms into the car.

Strap those things in!

Everyone be quiet! I'm behind on quotes.

"We only mock you because we're jealous of your massive bosoms."
"No. We mock you because we mock everyone."

Provide some hose and soap, and you too can have a porno movie!

She must be drunk. I groped her, and she didn't say anything. Everyone get out of the van so the breasts can be free.

If I'm Batman, does that mean I get to have an affair with Catwoman?

I can't get it up for some reason.

"See! We're loving, sharing, and giving!"
"Yeah, we share our diseases."

"You'd kick him out of bed?"
"I'd rather be in a convent!"

"Because I'm the most sensitive and caring?"
"No. You're the closest to the door."

I don't want to eat with her. She has mustard on her thing.

You could grope me.

"The special tonight is sirloin topped with blue cheese, caramelized onions, and mushrooms."
"Damn him! Damn the injustice! Damn him!"

"Wake me up when something good happens."
"Margarita's here."
"Bitch."

If you want to stop drinking, I can drive home. Wait... I mean...

You can tell I love him. I gave him some of my steak.

You will eat your pine nuts and you will like it. Then, bring me a phone book!

But, why is the rum gone?

"It's the Ninja-Piglet."
"I prefer the Ninjanator."

Don't make her laugh. You'll make her pee.

The Ninja-Piglet goes wee-wee-wee all the way home.

"Tear his ear off for me, would ya?"
"Sure."

There's no such thing as too much chocolate sauce.

Too much chocolate does not compute.

"Didn't we tell you? We're charging you $1000 for the condo."
"OK. I'll sell April."

Why do I have the image in my head of us making margaritas in a coffee pot?

Mighty Morphin' Power Nin!

I need something nice to drink my Scotch in. Maybe I'll get a shotglass with a donkey on it.

Arrrr! Avast! Ahoy!

Sorry, guys. We decided to go back to Ruby's, sit in the bar, get wasted, and pick up cowboys.

I'll come back after my arms unstiffen.

Is that a glowstick in your pocket or are you happy to see us?

It's like ET... but not.

Turn on your heart light.

I'm sure there's enough shots to go around. Then, we have tequila, and even more shots.

It's hotel room bartending!

Theres are good ice bucket margaritas.

Top me, baby!

That's my playboy bunny serving move.

Oh, hey! He's back to the point. Two hours later, but he's back to the point.

What was the quote I was supposed to write down?

No boobs in the booze!

Is that a Southern sobriety test? Spell 'of'?

Oh, he sucked it down!

We can dip your socks in tequila and set them on fire!

She doesn't remember anything except blowing Santa's reindeer.

"We agreed to have breakfast at 8:30, right?"
"Yes."
"That was dumb."

It's our job to scare people.

They don't have Johnny Depp coming by their table and writing down quotes.

I'm not stopping to pick up guys.

I want to stop and look at the yellow lines in the road.

Ow! I just gave myself a bad paper cut! I'm bleeding! Bad Escalante! Bad!

I hearby dub this town Boulder, Jr!

It's like mother nature threw up everywhere.

If you're going to fishtail and wipe out, wait till I pass you, OK?

"You scare me."
"Duh!"

"Dead Horse Ale: 'You can't beat a dead horse."

I can't believe I'm going to say this, but, this coleslaw needs cheese.

Go away little lizard! These are killer shoes!

It's a burning bush! It's an optical illusion! Moses was deceived!

My faith is destroyed! Thanks, God! Oh, wait... I don't believe in you anymore.

I love her facial expressions. It's worth the price of admission.

It's crispy yet soft. Does that make any sense?

"That salad today would've been better with heart of palm in it."
"Well, woo-hoo!"

"What state was that?"
"Don't remember."
"Kansas, Oklahoma, some flat state."

But, we can't grope anymore!

Why would she write about us? We didn't pee on her floor.

It's Peter Scolari and What's-His-Nuts...

It takes a long time to tie all that up.

Poor monkey-giblets.

"I'm not changing my clothes in Vegas. I probably blend in."
"They'll be asking you for drinks."

"How rude, crude, and lewd!"
"That's me!"

"Isn't that scary. There's two of us now."
"Oh, god."
"And she's coming on vacation with us again."
"Oh, god."

Disney isn't a vacation, it's a way of life.

We were celebrating life... by screaming.

I never kiss rivers and tell.

Okay, strange lady, love you, bye-bye.

You got virgins on the brain.

Posted by Ninjababe at 9:44 PM | Comments (4)

Map It, and They Will Come

I'm writing this post longhand on paper, in Moab, UT. Beautiful spot.

Well, it's not really on paper anymore, is it? By the time you read it, it's been digitized into bytes of data and you're viewing it on your computer screen. But, in its original format, it's on a piece of paper.

Anyway, back to the point. Yes, I have a point.

I've found something new to collect on this trip.

Topographical maps.

I've always liked looking at maps. And, during the years I was in England, I always got top marks in orienteering in school.

I haven't bought any maps yet, though. I figured out my new hobby yesterday. And today was spent rafting down the Colorado. Tomorrow, driving to Vegas. Sunday, home. Monday, back tot he drudgery of work.

Do they make topographical maps of cities?

National Geographic has a great line of maps that are waterproof and tear resistant. I think I may start with a few of those.

And, it's something compact and easy to pack!

OK... I'm going to bed now.

Posted by Ninjababe at 8:59 PM

Boo!

I'm back!

More in a bit... Typing stuff in now.

Posted by Ninjababe at 8:54 PM

September 8, 2003

Hey

Ooops!

I meant to mention this on Friday... I'm on vacation until next Monday!

I'm currently at a visitor's center in Cedar City, Utah (They have free net access) and thought this would be a good time to correct my mistake...

So, There may be a few posts between now and Monday, but don't count on it!

Posted by Ninjababe at 1:35 PM | Comments (1)

September 5, 2003

Praise be!

People at work seem to think K and I are miracle workers. So, I came up with this:

And, lo! The great and glorious Ninjababe and K did appear among the huddled masses from above.

And, lo! The two did smite the evil insurance companies, forcing them to provide proper medical care to the poor and weak patients.

And, lo! All was again well in the land of pharmacuticals

Posted by Ninjababe at 4:50 PM

September 4, 2003

Quotes! From the Evil One!

Glenn Reynolds, as overheard by Ninjababe:

"Ride me, baby!"

"I'm a little teapot, short and stout..."

"Damn, the nuclear powered blender is down again!"

"It's limp!"

And, Ninjababe did as ordered! [salutes]

(Hey, I'm a quote fiend. I can't report just one!)

Posted by Ninjababe at 9:01 PM | Comments (2)

September 2, 2003

My Inner Self

HASH(0x83cfe64)
Your inner self dosen't care about anyone or
anything..You Might of been born this way or
something happened in your past to make you
this way. i would get some help if i were you!


What Is Your Inner Self?
brought to you by Quizilla

(A Large 'Arrrrr!' to Jay for the link)

Posted by Ninjababe at 5:59 PM | Comments (2)

September 1, 2003

Look!

The Rappers of the Black Pearl

Fans of the Rappers of the Black Pearl

(Photos via IMDB. A big 'ARRRRRRR!' to Ith for finding them.)

Posted by Ninjababe at 6:16 PM