June 30, 2004
Editing...
I'm an angel. One of the clerks at work is taking summer English classes. I volunteered to edit her essays for the course.
So far, she's gotten A's on them. [Beam]
Today, I'm doing her most recent essay. She made a very funny error in her essay. Instead of tee shirts, she wrote tee shits. We all had a laugh over that.
June 29, 2004
I Am Deathwish Girl!
At work, K wants to kill me now.
I got this song in her head.
[beam]
June 28, 2004
Beauty!
This weekend, Ith and I went to our friends, Jen & Dave's, house.
We went to go to a wine dinner event type thing at our favorite winery, Bonny Doon. Love that winery. They make my all time, favorite, ultimate wine, Cardinal Zin, which is a Red Zinfidel.
Anyway... One of Ith's co-workers told her that she needs to see Brother Bear with the commentary on, as the moose do the commentary.
We've never seen Brother Bear, and we decided to watch the movie for the first time with the commentary on (including visuals).
The only thing I've seen that's more hilarious was Monty Python and the Holy
Grail.
We were laughing so hard in places, we were crying. And, we saw enough of the
movie to understand the movie itself.
The next day, we found ourselves saying 'eh' and 'beauty', not to mention,
'trample off!'.
The commentary was great. Real beauty, eh.
June 25, 2004
Blooming... Well, Maybe Not!
I was flashing the cover of the current People magazine, which has Orlando Bloom on the cover, to people at work. I was basically asked women, "Isn't he just hot!?"
One co-worker replied, "Who's that?"
The women around me, and I, all dropped our jaws. "You don't know who Orlando Bloom is?!"
So, I started listing movies:
"Lord of the Rings"
"Haven't seen it."
"Pirates of the Caribbean"
"Haven't seen it."
"Ned Kelly."
"Haven't seen it."
"Troy"
"He was in Troy?!"
"Yeah! He played Paris."
"Give me that! Nuh uh!"
[sigh]
I'm going to have to re-educate her on Mr. Bloom...
Ahoy, Matey!
The local mall is building a new theater. Currently, they have one of those big cranes on the site.
As I was pulling up in the mall last night, I look up and did a double take.
They were flying a Jolly Roger on top of the flag.
Oh, for a camera!
June 24, 2004
Yet More Work Quotes
Man... We're just cranking out the quotes at work! Basically, I wait till we have a certain number then post them. Here's the current batch:
"I could kick horses and they'd have to do what I say."
"You... S&M freak!"
"Your daughter thinks I'm a S&M freak."
"Yeah, and?"
"I feel so proud."
I don't know why, but my breasts hurt so bad right now!
She's a man in a little girl's body.
"If I remember correctly, it's $50 an inch."
"That I do not know... Are we talking about sex?"
"I could tell you a non-invasive, non-pharmaceutical method to prevent premature ejaculation, but I don't want you to go 'Oh my god!'"
"What?"
"A cock ring."
"I don't know what that is."
"Should we allow him to threaten the employees?"
"Yeah, sure, why not?"
"We sold her into the white slave trade."
"You're horrible."
"I try."
"Come back here before I give you an ugly name!"
"I already have an ugly name. It's called 'bitch'."
"Wait, wait, wait. Did I just hear you say you screwed up?!"
"Yes, I did."
"Oh my god, the world is ending!"
"I'm craving bourbon."
"Hah! That's not bad."
"Especially for 930 in the morning."
You're bi? It's great that you're comfortable enough to announce that!
"You'll just have to live your life in fear and anguish. [sob]"
"Uh.... yeah."
Let me say, if anyone in the world was a candidate for eyebrow waxing, he's the perfect one.
I can't do you today, OK? I can't do you.
June 22, 2004
Pirates! Arrr!
The Punning Pundit put up a Pirate Game.
My answer? Don't know if it's the correct one, but it sounds right to me!
Put below the extended entry link.
Udpate From a totally logical standpoint, it's not the correct answer. But, from a real life standpoint, it works for me!
Pirate 1 gets nothing... the others shoot him.
Pirate 4 ends up with it all... They go through the numbers until 4 & 5 are left. They vote against each other and since 4 gets the deciding vote in case of a tie, 4 shoots 5.
:)
I love pirates!
June 19, 2004
Spam! Wonderful Spam!
[hums spam song]
Love Monty Python!
So, I receive some major spam.
Lots and lots of spam.
So much spam, that I actually changed my email address from Ninjababe to Ninjababy... (Old in joke between friends. I'm the youngest, therefore, I'm the baby!)
Today, I received a piece of spam that says 'circumstantial mature cowgurlz play hard'
[blink blink]
[blink blink again]
[blink blink one more time]
OK... that's just... bizarre!
And, the images that it conjures up! Argh! Bad images! Bad! Back, you foul fiends! Back, I say!
June 18, 2004
Ewww!
Ith and I swear, ShopNBC should be the 'ugly jewelry channel'! We have yet to flip past it and see tasteful jewelry.
The things they show are atrocious! And really expensive!
Blargh!
What Celebrity are You?
This is cool!
You put in your picture, and it shows you the three celebrities you look the most like...
I did three pictures, and got these. Pictures are from the celeb site, links are from IMDB:
Gefitinib
Gefitinib is the chemical name for Iressa, a drug used for treatment of lung cancer.
We're all stumped on how to pronounce this. Is it Je-fit-i-nib? Ge-fit-i-nib? Some different version of it?
We're just going to call it Iressa and leave it at that...
Iressa sounds really pretty and would've made a pretty girl's name before the drug came out...
June 15, 2004
My name in Japanese...
My Japanese name is Ryusaki Arisa.
(Written the in proper fashion for Japanese. Last name then first name)
Via The Kawaii Japanese Name Generator
June 14, 2004
Current Work Quote List
Here is the quotes from work for the last three weeks:
Don't try to guilt me, babe. I live in guiltville! I'm Catholic!
"If you cuss or lie, you get a dot on your hand."
"Fuck that!"
"They say it's an herbal suppliment."
"Not to be confused with a Medicare suppliment. They work about the same though."
I thought it said 'deliver or die'.
I'm easily amused and easily entertained. It's what makes life worth living. Well... That, and good alcohol.
"I've become annoying."
"To whom?"
"Myself."
"Well, there's no help for that. Unless, you give yourself a stern talking to."
"I've tried."
"What happened?"
"It didn't work."
"Hate when that happens."
Hey, you just said you wanted to be an attack swan. Yeah, I want to be next to you and be the dog in your life so you can attack and drown me.
I look down and say, 'where's my shirt!'. Then, I remember I like cleavage.
I am a whirlwind of pain.
I want coffee, but it's four dollars. Four dollars I could spend at Disneyland. Well... Four dollars won't get you much at Dinseyland, so why not?
Just tell her we checked the center of the universe and it didn't have her picture.
Damn you and your ability to do simple arithmetic in your head!
I'm always willing to support the troops... Especially when they're scantily clad.
Who could not give my dad meds? I mean, come on!
"I need some magic time."
"I'm sorry. Magic time doesn't happen in public."
June 09, 2004
Adventures with Alcohol
Last weekend, Ith and I wanted a rusty nail. But, there wasn't anything really in the house to make it with (We did have an airplane sized bottle of Drambuie and the Scapa I've been saving for a really bad work day, but that Scotch is my security blanket!!). Well, Ith's mom was going grocery shopping. Since she owed us some alcohol, she said she'd buy it.
OK... I wrote down 'A small bottle of Drambuie' as I knew it was very expensive. Then, I put down Glenfiddich and Macallen to give her two choices (Yes, I know I can't spell them and I'm sneaking on at work to post this, so I can't find the spelling...).
She comes back with a large bottle of Drambuie and a $45 dollar bottle of Macallen! We told her she shouldn't have, but she said she owed us.
I commented that I'd probably go to hell for making Rusty Nails out of a $50 bottle of single malt. Then, I made them anyway.
They were damn fine rusty nails though!
June 07, 2004
Emeril meets Medicare
On the Medicare provider website:
Bwahahahahahahaha!
June 06, 2004
Footy! Update
So, I found out why the mp3 for the Footy animation isn't available.
The artist created the song.
Cool! He's even more gifted than I thought.
And, he has a CD! Yay! Granted, the version of the song on the CD isn't the Football one, but still... I have to buy this CD.
June 03, 2004
There were no batteries at Helm's Deep!
Or Badgers either!
(Batteries comes from Ith, who misheard me about the Badgers...)
Footy! Footy! ...
I really want an mp3 of the song on this.
And, it's a very cool animation as well.
Plus, very catchy...
June 02, 2004
Bwahahahahaha!
An email I just received on one of my many email lists:
I am A vampire iam over 51 years old but dont prejudge me because of my age. judge me on what iam a vampire with special psychic abilities.I am attract to the vampire lifestyle because who iam a older vampire i love music books vampire night clubs and young women iam lored vampire
Obviously, he's a vampire who never learned to spell, punctuation, or proper grammar.
[snorfle]
I'm sorry... I shouldn't make fun of the vampires of the world.
I apologize.